Well, here we are on day 21. I am pretty much feeling back to normal again. I sometimes getting fleeting moments of mild anxiety, but they pretty much come and go without much fanfare. My appetite is back, I am sleeping through the night, although I am still taking a couple of Valerian based supplements before bed. The past 3 days I have actually started feeling happy again.
I because very spiritual when I was high, I would sit in nature and soak it in and really felt close to the Earth, and to God, I have started feeling this again now while sober, and I am so grateful that it wasn't just an effect of the drug. I am still keeping an open mind that the anxiety may visit from time to time, and that I might have a bad day here and there, but my outlook is changing. I am no longer fearful of the future, and I fully intend to live my good days to the best of my ability. I am reminded of a quote...
The Dalai Lama, when asked what surprised him most about humanity, he said:
Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money.
Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health.
And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present;
the result being that he does not live in the present or the future;
he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.”
I think this is something we should all think about. When we have a bad day, we should have a bad day, and let it pass, when we have a good day, we should enjoy it for what it is, a good day. If we spend all of our days worrying about what tomorrow might bring, we have lived an entire life of worry, how is that any way to live?
Sometimes I feel like there is nothing but "Right Now", everything else is either a memory, or a thought about the future, "Right Now" Is all there really is.
Day 23, Things are going pretty darn good now. I am still taking some sleepy herbs at bedtime, but I probably don't need to. The new cat is my new little buddy, but boy can he talk a lot, hence the help with the sleep. It seems he just wants to lay on my head while I sleep so I wake up all puffy eyed and alergy like =P. Anyway. I wake up feeling fine, and I go to bed feeling fine. Once in awhile thought the day, I might get a slight anxious feeling but a few deep breaths and it usually passes. My appetite is fully back, and I have gained back about half the weight I lost. Going to the bathroom is just starting to get back to normal again.
I have no desire to smoke pot at all. I pretty much never had cravings becuase the withdrawal was so darn unpleasant, but I did miss the habit, the physical act of smoking. I bought a pipe and some tobacco and a few times had some puffs Hugh Hefner style just to appease the habit, but that is pretty much going away as well. So aside from some sporatic and occasional 'mild' anxiety, things are getting much better.
Congratulations on quitting mysticbus, thanks for sharing your experience and don't worry, people definitely read these stories.
I personally never thought I was able to quit until I spent a good amount of time lurking here and reading other people's experience.
Unfortunately, this is my 2nd time here.. You can probably find my posts from 2010 when I first attempted to quit(turning 24 this year--been a daily user since 16)
Last time I quit, with help from this forum, I was able to go cold turkey for 7 months.
I had gotten back on track with my life, this is where I went wrong, I thought everything was fine and dandy and I had completely forgotten the reason why I quit and decided to smoke again..
And my addiction came back with a vengeance, using much more than I ever have. I hope anyone reading this won't be repeating my mistake.
I'm currently on day 2, funny, just like you I told myself I wasn't going to EVER smoke again due to how terrible it was to quit the first time around(complete lack of appetite, unable to sleep and when I do I had horrible nightmares and would be drenched in sweat throughout the night, and very irritable, though I try to contain myself from exploding at the innocent people and my dogs).
Well here I am again, with only myself to blame, stay strong!
Day 24, and it was a trying day. My daughter had a car wreck a couple weeks back, wasn't her fault, but I fought all day with the other persons insurance, and got pretty frustrated. Then tonight, my daughter was acting all moody and pushing my buttons. So here I am, I started feeling a little 'off' after dinner, then I got uncomfortably warm and feeling a bit anxious and irritable again. But this is probably one of those days that pot would have fixed right up. I drank some tea, and I am trying to relax, might be getting a .ittle better, but it sure is a downer after feeling so good for several days.
I think I read about PAWS somewhere, and it sounded like this, with the good parts getting longer and longer. I'm gonna try and relax, and touch back in tomorrow. Have a good night guys.
Day 26. The last time I posted I was feeling a bit of anxiety and a hot flash. After I posted that, I lied down in bed, and watched some TV and relaxed. Within an hour I was completely fine again. That was Friday night. Saturday was maybe the best day yet. I woke up and cooked breakfast for my wife, we then went out to the grocery store to get some snack food and things to stay in for the weekend. We spent the afternoon watching movies on netfilx, had our daughter run out and get some take out dinner later in the evening, and had a great, great day. I had a little trouble getting to sleep Saturday night, so I took a couple Valerian pills and then slept until 11AM this morning, we got up, and then went out to breakfast, and are just home being chill today again. Feeling good, and having a great weekend. Not feeling like I need pot, just enjoying the day....
Thank you aliciarm.
Today is day 27. Things are really getting back to normal again. Every day I get fleeting feelings of anxiety, but usually very mild and mostly gone within 15 mins. If it never gets better than this, I can enjoy a happy and full life. I have started taking interest in things again. I bought a bunch of new parts for my bicycle. Yesterday I sold a pistol, and spent the night picking out a new target pistol. I am itching to ride my motorcycle if this rain ever stops. I even played and enjoyed some video games this afternoon. The only holdout is getting to sleep, every night I try to go to sleep un-aided, but end up taking a couple of those gnc natra-sleep to make it happen, but I then sleep through, and can even sleep in until 11 if I don't wake myself up. All in all, things sure could be worse. Every day I am grateful for how far I have come, and the progress I have made.
This is around day 37. The last couple of days have been a little rough. Two days ago, I woke up feeling sick to my stomach, and I had pretty severe naseua, I did throw up, and the afternoon started feeling a bit better, yesterday I felt 'ok' most of the day, not perfect, but alright. Last night I went out to dinner with my wife, and had a margarita, after I got home, some anxiety really started coming on, I took a couple of Kava capsules and that pretty much made me feel almost back to normal, and I had a good nights sleep. This morning there was mild anxiety, but I got some bad news a couple of hours ago and it came back on quite strong, almost as bad as the first days. I took one Kava capsule, and I am feeling a bit better. I might note, that I am using herbal relaxers, such as Kava and Valerian, but I switched em up so I don't get too used to any one thing.
I am not sure if the alchohol had anything to do with it, but it is easy enough to abstain, so I will.
The last couple weeks have been pretty darn good, with only fleeting bits of anxiety here and there. I am hoping that this set back is what they refer to as Post Acute WIthdrawal Symptoms, it seems if this is the case, you get a bad few days every so often, and they are supposed to become more and more infrequent.
Is this something you guys who are ahead of me have experienced? These set backs are a real drag, especially after you have been feeling pretty good. I just do my best to put it in perspective, and know... this too shall pass.
I have to update, day 38. I don't think my last few days are related to marijuana withdrawal. Today I have had a headache all day, and tired, and burning eyes, and some mild nausea. Tonight I am running a slight fever. It would appear as though I have a cold or a flu or something.
Day 44. Whatever I had I got over, it lasted about 3 days. Now I am feeling better, and not showing any symptoms at all. I feel completely normal again. I am sleeping fine with no aid, really no anxiety. Perfectly normal. I will report back if things change.