Day number 3 without dope

[pursuit of happiness]

This shit is a battle. A battle with myself that i need to win. I havent slept in 3 days and i feel so depressed at times. I know i cant be a casual smoker and this is scaring me. I know its because of the habit i have created. Slowly i am coming to see that i cant smoke the drug at all. I have to let go of this horrible addiction. Shit is hard as can be at the moment but i need to get my life back.!!! I have to keep strong and fight the simple ideas of temptation constructed in my brain telling me its ok to smoke once a week. Even if i do smoke once a week, i know that eventually the vicious cycle will catch up to me. Its not even a thing of not being able to control myself to just smoke once a week, its more like i dont want to have to smoke to be happy!. I dont want the drug in my life anymore. Any substance that you think is under control because you do it once a week, that is just a way for you to trick yourself into that same vicious cycle. I appreciate the responses and the support. Needabreak you're awesome man. Thanks for the insight!

[needabreak]

it is tough dude-but believe me, its not gona tough for ever-one of my toughest nights ever was a tuesday-3 and a half weeks in-i was so close to caving in-i just couldnt handle it at all-i lay on my sofa and blubbered like a big wain-held my arms round myself and just fell apart-i remember thinkin about a support group that i could go to and share experience-but i also knew i was in such a bad way i wouldnt have went-picture the scene-10 or so pot addicts siiting round screwed up-with a counsellor noddin agreement-my turn to speak-and me lying on the floor havin a complete mental breakdown right ther in front of them all-they'd a thought who's this nutter?thats how it would have been-on the rehab group we can get stuff out and its safe-we feel secure in our own space and yet we'r able to share with others-i think its great ur able to come on here and say to us and urself how bad it is-thats wats helped me-

i been thinkin about wer i'm at now-and it hasnt been that long-but something has changed for me-i mean about how i'm seein pot and how i'm seein me-to stop a pot problem we have to sacrifice a month or so-time is a great healer is a sayin thats lasted longer than the roman empire-because its true-true sayings will last forever-they give us hope-i know its tough-i know the hopelessness that people can feel-and i also know that if we get over that dryin out part life can get so much better again-ther comes times wer all i can say is no matter how soul destroying it gets just hang in ther-hang on with ur last finger tip-time allows u to get a better grip-to fight ur way back up-and u will be able to walk off this awful viscious circle-i was a totally hopeless case who saw the only way out was to end it all-and that was only 3 months ago-life's good now-and will get better-

one problem we have is that too many people dont know the true extent of the grip smokin can have on us-i dont think i was addicted to the smoke-but i was addicted to how it made me feel-it helped me cut the world out and float through life brain dead-and the more i floated the harder it was to stop-many people with addictions say u gotta hit rock bottom b4 u see wer u are-ther is something in this-but no matter how low i felt i knew ther wer layers of crapness below me-i suppose we'r all at different levels in it-but ther's a thread that consumes us all-misery-worry-anxiety-isolation-pointlessness-others will tell us its only a smoke-and thats all it is-but this 'only smoke' has created a chemical reaction in us that knocks us down-sucks all the life out of us-others dont really understand this inner blackness-its as real as a real thing-

wat i really want to say is this-no matter how hopeless u see it-no matter how bad u feel inside urself-no matter how hard or impossible it seems to get free-u can-many of us are hopeless cases cause thats wat it has done-we can turn it around-it doesnt feel good-coming round can feel as bad as doin it-but u are gettin better-it'll feel like its never gona get any better-u'll feel like u'v done some serious damage to ur brain-stopping and giving urself time to come round is the answer-i wish i could explain properly how hopeful i am now-for me-for everyone who's messed their sh'it up by doin this-over a month ago my form would have been about minus 8 out of 10-now i think its sittin at about plus 7 or 8-u can pull it around by putting in this time now-not bein able to sleep-depression-worry-i went through all them things too-u will feel better-u just gotta take ur oil for now and stick with it-its hard but a road worth struggling threw-the feelin at the end makes it all worth while-good luck dudes-stick with it-

[Cannabis Rehab Admin]

Weeds the kind of drug that it’s not until you try to detox that you realize just how hooked you are, quitting is a mental battle and the mind will construct every argument you can think of to get you to smoke again, it’s funny how human thinking works, we often try to find arguments to support what we want to do and how we would like things to be rather than how they actually are, try to focus on why want to detox and try to find arguments to support that. Make sure the way you are thinking is working in your favour rather than against you.

Hang in the mate you are doing great. Thanks for sharing and please continue to keep us posted.