I am addicted and don't know what to do...

[Cannabis Rehab Guest]

Hi everyone,

I am a 31 year old female, been using cannabis regularly since age 14. Using daily for the past 7 years, multiple times daily. About 2 years ago I stopped "smoking" and started "vaporizing" but the frequency or amount used did not decrease. In fact, I loved vapor even more than smoke so my addiction got worse.

I am tired of the run-around. If I'm not doing it (trying to hide and be discreet) then I am thinking about it, trying to get it, etc. When I don't have it I become depressed, agitated, lots of yelling and crying, I have so much trouble controlling my emotions.

It's like my life revolves around it, and when I run out my life is miserable. I can't live like that anymore. I'm tired of chasing it, tired of depleting my finances, tired of having that uncontrollable craving every few hours. Personally, I would use every day, all day if it was there for me. It's not the cannabis that is destroying me in my mind, it is running out of it. But even I know that's the wrong way to be.

I cannot go to cannabis rehab for several reasons. I'm on my own with this, it's not even Day 1 and I am terrified and stressed. I don't want to be an addict anymore...I stopped smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol heavily awhile back with little trouble, but it's so much harder for me to stop this because I love it so much.

I'm so tortured over this...thanks everyone...

Ang

[Anorak]

You can do it

Sounds like you're at a turning point in your relationship with dope,sorry you are having a bad time with this. I know the feelings and behaviours you describe. I never had a problem with weed, it was only the thought of, or the reality of ,not having it that caused problems for me .I Was a heavy chonger for over twenty years,I had to hit rock bottom before I could make changes .

After a couple of months without, most people feel a lot better and their self esteem goes up .Once you have stopped you may have to work on not starting again, which in my experience is a bit of a different thing...

You can do it..cutting down for a few weeks first and then just taking it one day at a time is probably a less harsh way to detox than just stopping outright but there is no one way to do it..

This rehab group is good you can learn so much and realize you are not alone in this..

Best wishes to you and good luck in whatever you decide to do....Anorak

[Cannabis Rehab Admin]

Hi Ang welcome to the forum.

I know what it’s like for your life to revolve around weed. My life was completely orientated around smoking dope, I too found marijuana allot more addictive than alcohol and tobacco, because like you I loved it so much.

Have you tried gradually reducing the amount you smoke before quitting? I found this really helped. You may want to check out our How to detox smoking marijuana post.

I know it’s hard but you are not alone, anytime you want to get something off your chest we are here to listen.

Good luck and please keep us posted on how it goes.

[Cannabis Rehab Guest]

I know exactly what you're talking about Ang.
I am 17, and i know what life is like to revolve around the drug sadly.

I won't sugar coat this, by using different words. the drug is addictive as hell.
Just today my parents found my phone and went through everything i invest my life in.
They found everyone i smoke with, (everyone of my "friends") who i get it from, everything.

They've given me so many opportunities to quit, they've caught me so many times that you'd think they'd give up by now. My life revolves around weed, marijuana, sweet leef, green, goody, and i fckin hate it. I've tried to detox before, but it was because i got put on probation.
I saw it as a sign from god that i needed to change. First day i got off probation i was high again. These people are trying to say you should try decreasing how much u smoke but that doesnt change anything.

You can just get better the drug and still be reducing your "dose".
You need to get on your hands and knees, and cry. Cry your heart, and eyes out to god. I'm sort of a hypocrite by saying this because i have yet to do this. I am worried about what other people will say and how hard its going to be. I keep obsessing over the fact that i might not have the good "high times with my bros" anymore. But you and I both know we should squash it while we can. I'm too young to be as hooked as i am, finding every opportunity you can to get it and be high at the cost of everyone else. This post is sincere as hell. God will turn your life around. If you talk to him, he will talk back. And you will be able to tell trust me. Signs will show when u ask him something. Or you wont stop thinking about an answer. But be careful when the devil tries to cloud your mind. Think about it... When you first started, you had a voice saying "maybe this isnt right. i shouldnt do this" but you ignored it to see what it was like. Now you've been ignoring it and smoking for so long that you don't hear him anymore. Tell me if I'm wrong? This is exactly what happened to me until today. I can hear him again and I know he'll take care of me. You just need to have the willpower to take control of the bull by the horns and STICK IT THROUGH. I hope this helps and you take my advice. Much respect for trying Ang,

One love,
James

[geedee]

Join 'em

Was looking for stuff on MJ use & was wondering how addicted I am and yep I am. I quit using yesterday and don't plan on using again. Over the past 8 years it really screwed up my life. I was in court yesterday getting our final divorce and it really got me thinking. I have 2 sons 19 and 17 one of the quit the other still uses. Thanks for your sharing peps, I will keep reading.

geedee

[Cannabis Rehab Guest]

Ang here again...

Hey everyone,

Thanks for your supportive responses. I don't feel so alone in this anymore. Today is actually Day One, and I am ashamed to say it isn't a conscious choice I made but more of an issue of finances and running out.

I am going to look over the resources about tapering down. I am just not sure I can do it cold turkey, nor do I really want to. At this point I still feel like it's my best friend, and last night I did cry, cried for two hours in a dark room because I felt like my best friend was gone.

I don't know if it matters, but I am in an extremely unhappy marriage and when I don't "use" it really comes into focus and I become even unhappier.

Anyway, I am going to read through the posts, the resources, try and taper if I can't stop cold turkey. Thank you all so much for your responses and your courageous sharing.

Sincerely,
Angie