Reply to Thread

Post a reply to the thread: Alice's quit journal

Your Message

Click here to log in

What Color are Doves? (enter your answer in lower case)


You may choose an icon for your message from this list

Additional Options

  • Will turn into [URL][/URL].


Topic Review (Newest First)

  • 07-04-2019, 10:15 AM
    Hi Alice your post reminds me of something i hear a lot: the opposite of addiction is connection. I dont know what city youre referring to or why you moved, but im glad its somewhere that brought you peace.
  • 07-04-2019, 08:39 AM
    Am in the process of spring cleaning my apartment (in the middle of winter) for a house inspection next week. I am going deep with the cleaning and going through old papers and journals. All of this reflection on years past makes me realise how messy my life was, and how much I struggled to get out of the grips of those addictions.
    The funny thing is that all that counselling and all those worksheets may have helped, they may have helped build a foundation, but I was never going to quit cannabis until I moved to the city and got socially connected.
    After 8 years of struggling with daily use, I moved to the city and gave up in less than a year.

    It makes me realise how cannabis can be a symptom of a larger social problem. I would encourage you to dig deep to find out what it is that you need. Social connection can be a big help in your quest to be cannabis free. I read an article not so long ago about how community and social connection was the biggest thing that keeps people away from drugs. I would definitely agree with that!

    All the evidence of my addiction is now donated, shredded, recycled, or for the most worthwhile nuggets of wisdom, kept. I have also shredded the past two years of journals. Although I find it helpful to use a journal to 'work things out', I don't get a lot of reading back on them, and so, the progress that I have made as a person is in the fact that I am so different now to how I was one, two, eight years ago!

    It is very freeing, and very rejuvenating :-)
  • 04-24-2019, 12:02 PM
    What a fantastic feeling that must be!
    I am so happy for you! :-)
  • 04-24-2019, 05:42 AM
    I am noticing something nice about my mind these past few days. It feels 'squeaky clean' in a way that I have never noticed before in my adult life. Of course, I smoked on and off since 16 until 39, so I have never really known what three whole years of adult life with absolutely no cannabis feels like. It feels good, like I am always growing and that I am building my life. Each time I take a step towards experiencing new growth, I feel like my mind is cleaning itself still.
  • 04-21-2019, 05:15 AM
    Hey John,
    It is interesting. I completely hear you with regard to the nostalgia, except I think it might hit a little closer to home at 1.5 years as opposed to 3. To be honest, I don't think there is the possibility of going back to the smoking a few times a year once we have been addicted. I don't think this is a possibility even for my friend. Our brains have a certain level of receptors and once we feed them, they will require feeding at the same level as when we were smoking every day.

    I think that if we are to consider smoking, we need to think of it as the whole box and dice. If we smoke we are going to be smoking every day and tired, and strung out and maybe even scratching around for another smoke. It is going to eventually get to the worst part rather than the best.

    The best antidote to all of this is to develop a very strong 'no' reason, why you just don't want to go there. I found mine on the weekend. When my friend offered me her pipe I remembered how incredibly paranoid I would get when I smoked and how social situations were such a complete nightmare. That really would have been a terrible way to spend a girl's weekend, so it was easy to say 'no'. I think each of us have one of those no reasons, and that is the thing that we don't want to go back to, the reason why we stopped in the first place.

    Those memories from uni are nice, but it is never going to be like it was. The good news is that life is good here too. I would even maybe say, better? :-)

  • 04-21-2019, 02:21 AM
    Interesting experience indeed.

    I am glad you did not wobble and that it was a reaffirming experience for you about being on the other side. I am really glad to not be using cannabis anymore as well.

    Although, and we have discussed this before a bit I think, I do get nostalgic for it. Just earlier this evening, Saturday evening, I was driving home from work around 9 and suddenly thought back to my high school/early university days and what I might be doing on a Saturday evening with my friends. Driving around, maybe going to somebody's house. Often someone would pull out a joint and we would smoke. And laugh ourselves silly. I miss it in that way. But not in the way it was for me toward the end.

    Someone recently said to me they get high a few times a year, often before going to a concert. Ahhh... nice. Maybe I could do that. I used to be that way before I started doing it every day. But guess what? It's not worth risking being bounced back to the awful state I was in all of last year. Noooo thank you!

    And, like you, Alice, I am really very happy being on the other side.
    Cheers to the other side!!

  • 04-20-2019, 10:15 PM
    Had an interesting experience over the weekend. I went away with some girlfriends and found out that one of them smokes weed. All the time. The wake and bake scenario. It was my first time being in close proximity or being offered weed to smoke and it was interesting to observe how once all the wobbly, seedy, strung out level of functioning has passed, it is oh so easy to watch someone else smoke and smell the aroma and not even wobble in terms of wanting some for myself.

    It was also interesting to see with some perspective what smoking weed actually does to you. I don’t want to go into the details because it would be a bit judgemental, but I can certainly see how stoners present themselves to the world.

    She says that she is not addicted. I am not so sure. I do think that she has had a difficult life on some levels and maybe smoking cannabis is an escape.

    I always thought she was upbeat and chatty. Now I know that energy was coming from somewhere!
    I am so happy to be on the other side.
  • 03-22-2019, 04:40 AM
    Hi there Admin :-)
    It is interesting to read about the difference between CBD and THC. I might try some CBD medicinally, although I am not sure how willing my doctor would be to prescribe it!
    Although I am not at all interested in the mess that would ensue if I were to start smoking again, it might be THC that creates that mess.
    I should definitely read more about it in any case. Maybe taking CBD would not trigger cravings for smoking cannabis, in which case, it would definitely be worth a shot.
    Thanks so much for your thoughts :-)
    Hope its been a good 13 years. Wish I could say the same ;-)
  • 03-21-2019, 03:20 PM
    Cannabis Rehab Admin
    CBD's are known to have a anti anxiety and anti pychotic effect for some, it's the THC that has the opposite effect for most and one of the biggest problems with most modern day weed which is very high in THC compared to CBD. You can get CBD oils and capsules without THC and legally in many countries now including here in the UK.

    If you genuinely feel it has that effect on you then if you are able you could always use it as you feel necassary or in the event of an epsiode to see if it helps. It's not saying you would have to use it regulary if you felt it was the right choice for you, I guess views are probably quite divided on whether it is a good idea or not after having quit. Genuine medicinal use though is in fairness a different thing to recreational. Yes 13 years, where does the time go, still IMO it was the right decision for me.

    All the best,
  • 03-21-2019, 07:34 AM
    Thanks so much CRA :-)
    It is so nice to really experience what it is like to live cannabis free. And I think you are right. It can take some time to appreciate just how rewarding life can be without cannabis. I loved that about quitting. After the initial withdrawal, it was like a gift that kept on giving for quite some time, years even!

    I do have to stay vigilant of some things. I haven't really been tested with the peer pressure test as yet. I think if I were hanging around old friends who still smoke occasionally, it would be more difficult. Thankfully, as we get older, the peer pressure thing becomes less likely. I still hope that I would have the presence of mind to remind myself that some kind of 'party smoke' would just get me back on the hamster wheel, and not do it.

    It is a bit weird that I have had two episodes of mental illness in the past six months, which is two more than the none I had in the five years previous to that. I do wonder if some ingredient in cannabis helps to keep me out of psychosis, but the better news is that I recover more quickly and do a lot less damage without cannabis in my life.

    All in all, I am very happy to be sitting here on the other side, without addiction really being a part of my life at all!

    Thanks again for your support. I can't believe that you have been free for 13 years!! That really is something :-)
This thread has more than 10 replies. Click here to review the whole thread.

Posting Permissions

  • You may post new threads
  • You may post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts