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Thread: Was blind but now I see

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    11

    Default

    Here is my very brief story. I am a male, 33 yr old, started smoking when I was 15, pretty much have been a daily chronic smoker since high school. Today is Day 5 smoke free! The longest I have ever stopped was about 2-weeks, but usually when I try to detox it only lasts 4-5 days. This time I feel completely different.

    It is crazy how I can completely relate to these discussions. These past 5 days have been a huge struggle for me. Reading all your posts is what has kept me from lighting up a bowl. THANK YOU ALL!!!

    Catalyst…. I can relate to a lot of what you have said…. I am dealing with losing a very dear girlfriend that means everything to me. Your comments “getting stoned night after night……numbing out the emotions…” wow I feel exactly the same way. This is why I am here; I realize for the first time in my haze I called life, that it is time to make a huge change.

    I too have realized that marijuana has affected my relationships (or lack of them) and basic social skills. This is just one reason why I really want to quit. I haven’t read the book you mentioned, but I have read similar thoughts on accepting “what is”. I do believe everything happens for reason and sometimes we don’t see the benefit at first. For me, losing her has made me realize that it is time for a huge change in my life and for the first time in over 15 years, I can see the haze starting to clear up!

    DesertGirl…. I hear you; I too have had crazy dreams and sleepless nights. Other side effects have been…. A complete loss of appetite…. This is getting better, day 2 and day 3 were the worst, I didn’t eat much, and I have already lost about 6lbs (this is probably a good thing) Fidgetiness and lack of concentration…. I haven’t watch TV for the past 5 Days, I can’t, I just don’t have the concentration to sit there and stare at the TV (maybe this too is a good thing). It’s weird, I almost feel dumber on Day 5 than I did when I was smoking pot on a daily basis, or is it that now I am just more aware of what is going on?

    Nakisai…. “he became almost retarded…stuff he said and did...lost great character…extremely selfish” I am ashamed to say that this is partly the reason why my girlfriend has left me. I realize now that I developed Apathy: an absence of emotion, enthusiasm, interest in things generally. I can’t believe I have become this.

    The hardest part of all this is the boredom. I am trying to keep myself occupied, but it isn’t easy. I tried to keep this brief, there is soooo much I could say, thanks all for listening!

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    43

    Default Hey

    Sorry to hear that. It is a horriable feeling when the fog starts to lift up to the clouds and by then, it is to late. It must hurt to loose your gf. Maybe one day she will come back to you if you quite. You never know.

    I never understood why people like my ex have such a hard time seeing reality. I told him a couple times, up front and open. "Your the drug smoking gives me strong erges to leave you" and even then, it didn't click into his head that things were really going down hill and he was running out of time. I don't even think it was a huge surprise to him that I left him even. I don't really care anymore though. He wont change and I am fine with that.

    For assistance with finding a reputable and accredited Marijuana Rehab Service Provider in the USA you can call the US Government’s FREE SAMHSA’s National Helpline on:

    1-800-662-HELP (4357)



    I am getting to know this one guy and he is extreamly nice we had our first hang out yesturday. It was great.

    Keep your chin up brother and don't give up on quitting.

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