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Thread: How to help myself?

  1. #1
    Unregistered Cannabis Rehab Guest

    Default How to help myself?

    I started self medicating 4 years ago. A little over 3 and a half months ago I quit cold turkey. About a week later I seriously thought I was developing a mental illness bc the anxiety and crying and all the bad symptoms hit me like a semi truck. I thought that bc of the popular idea that weed does't cause symptoms other that being angry and irritated. I seriously thought that was all that was going to happen to me. I was proven soooo wrong....anyway I'm getting closer to 4 months and my symptoms come and go I don't feel them as bad as when everything started or like the second month which was still pretty bad. I still have distorted vision (not as bad). My emotions feel like they are blocked or something? Like I could feel slightly more of a good feeling but it still feels far away. Also the weird thoughts...of questioning reality...I stopped caring about that but it still kinda pops into my head its more annoying than scary...not really scary anymore. I've herd about even more improvements after the 6 month mark. I'm really looking forward to that but I still have my down moments and doubts. I try to keep myself busy. I go out, I watch some tv but it kind of hurts my eyes n then my head. Another thing did anyone get like weird nerve (nero pain) in their head? Like shooting pains? and feeling extremely hot like couldn't regulate body temp? I'm an artist and I haven't drawn bc of my vision so I have to find other coping skills bc where I live its over a 100 outside so going out a lot isn't always an option for me bc I ride the bus. Anything will be greatly appreciated! ^_^

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  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I started self medicating 4 years ago. A little over 3 and a half months ago I quit cold turkey. About a week later I seriously thought I was developing a mental illness bc the anxiety and crying and all the bad symptoms hit me like a semi truck. I thought that bc of the popular idea that weed does't cause symptoms other that being angry and irritated. I seriously thought that was all that was going to happen to me. I was proven soooo wrong....anyway I'm getting closer to 4 months and my symptoms come and go I don't feel them as bad as when everything started or like the second month which was still pretty bad. I still have distorted vision (not as bad). My emotions feel like they are blocked or something? Like I could feel slightly more of a good feeling but it still feels far away. Also the weird thoughts...of questioning reality...I stopped caring about that but it still kinda pops into my head its more annoying than scary...not really scary anymore. I've herd about even more improvements after the 6 month mark. I'm really looking forward to that but I still have my down moments and doubts. I try to keep myself busy. I go out, I watch some tv but it kind of hurts my eyes n then my head. Another thing did anyone get like weird nerve (nero pain) in their head? Like shooting pains? and feeling extremely hot like couldn't regulate body temp? I'm an artist and I haven't drawn bc of my vision so I have to find other coping skills bc where I live its over a 100 outside so going out a lot isn't always an option for me bc I ride the bus. Anything will be greatly appreciated! ^_^
    What follows is similar to a post I made on another thread but it fits here, too.

    Much of what you report is EXACTLY how I felt (and many others if you read this forum). I had vision issues early on but they went away in 2 months. Questioning reality was common for me, too. That went away after several months. How's your sleep? Mine was horrible - panic, sweats, grinding dreams. My sleep is 90% normal now. No nero pain or hot flashes for me but everyone is different. In my first few months of withdrawal I would be convinced all the mental stuff was from withdrawal but then I would waiver and become convinced it couldn't be withdrawal and I had simply become mentally ill. The good news - it IS withdrawal. You will begin having more and more hours of normalcy, then more and more days of normalcy. Those few days will become a whole week of feeling normal. However, the fall backs will occur causing all the same doubts you had about withdrawal/mental illness. Then, a good week of normalcy becomes two weeks, and so on. I felt I turned the corner at 4 months and around 5 months even more so (July 10 will be 6 months). I am at the point now where thoughts of "Why do I feel like this?" and "What's wrong with me?" are no longer a daily thing because I feel good (still get some sleep issues or depressed hours but nothing like it was). Whatever you're doing is working because you're heading towards 4 months cold turkey and you are reporting improvement. Recognize your strength cuz you got it! Just know, those dang relapses do occur but they'll be less and less frequent.

  3. #3
    Unregistered Cannabis Rehab Guest

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    Hey yeah! You replied to me. On the another post. I cant sign into my account and post anything for some reason it doesnt let me only as a guest. I replied to our other post. Yeah my vision still isnt 100 n it sucks. N like I said in my other post I had a terrible night. But anyway I want to tell you something I didn't say on my other post. Congrats on the almost 6 months. You too are strong and you have to keep going. I'm rooting for you.

  4. #4
    Unregistered Cannabis Rehab Guest

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    Also I wanted to ask you. Did you or do you feel like emotionally numb?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Also I wanted to ask you. Did you or do you feel like emotionally numb?
    Thanks for the nice words. I never felt emotional numbness during withdrawal, if anything my emotions were more intense. Sometimes I wished they were numb! I think withdrawal can be that way with emotions where some people are numb and others are the opposite. I've read on this forum where during withdrawal some folks have increased appetite/weight gain while others lose appetite/weight. It seems the most common shared symptoms are anxiety, sleep disruption and irritability.

  6. #6
    Unregistered Cannabis Rehab Guest

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    I feel like the good and happy feelings are hard to feel. The anger and bad ones aren't too numb lol. I do get irritated and angry for the smallest of things. I have herd that some people get intense emotions and some go numb. I'm a very emotional person I'm very motherly and my emotions really dictate the way I am and think. I have been like that sense I was very little. So being like this really gets me. kissing my kids or my husband and not feeling that bust of happiness I always do kills me. I know I love them the feeling was very light and its gotten a tiny bit better as the days go by. But I just want it back. I had to stop and think that logically love and feeling good starts in the brain ( the cold hard truth lol) so instead of trying to feel it in my heart I started trying I guess feel it in my head lol. Yeah I lost weight and threw up alot. I don't feel like myself at 100% which is what I'm waiting for so bad and this weird feeling in my head that I have 24/7 like a dizzy pressure type thing and my vision isn't there either. The lights still seem pretty bright for me. I can't go outside without my shades bc its still a little too much. Yeah anxiety, irritability and bad sleep. I didn't have insomnia but I would have a hard time going to sleep and would wake up a lot also all bc of the anxiety. Then it was randomly just waking up. I hope you continue to keep feeling better. We have to keep pulling forward ^_^

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I feel like the good and happy feelings are hard to feel. The anger and bad ones aren't too numb lol. I do get irritated and angry for the smallest of things. I have herd that some people get intense emotions and some go numb. I'm a very emotional person I'm very motherly and my emotions really dictate the way I am and think. I have been like that sense I was very little. So being like this really gets me. kissing my kids or my husband and not feeling that bust of happiness I always do kills me. I know I love them the feeling was very light and its gotten a tiny bit better as the days go by. But I just want it back. I had to stop and think that logically love and feeling good starts in the brain ( the cold hard truth lol) so instead of trying to feel it in my heart I started trying I guess feel it in my head lol. Yeah I lost weight and threw up alot. I don't feel like myself at 100% which is what I'm waiting for so bad and this weird feeling in my head that I have 24/7 like a dizzy pressure type thing and my vision isn't there either. The lights still seem pretty bright for me. I can't go outside without my shades bc its still a little too much. Yeah anxiety, irritability and bad sleep. I didn't have insomnia but I would have a hard time going to sleep and would wake up a lot also all bc of the anxiety. Then it was randomly just waking up. I hope you continue to keep feeling better. We have to keep pulling forward ^_^
    Sorry for the delayed response, had a busy few days. That does sound frightening, not getting that bliss when being affectionate with kids/husband. I can only say, if it felt good before then it WILL feel good again. The brain is still readjusting to its new situation of no more THC.

    The weird feeling in your head seems more acute than mine did but my reality was definitely screwed up. For months I kept asking myself "What's wrong with me?" and "Why do I feel this way?" Those questions are gone now.

    As for irritability, it was my first withdrawal symptom and it caused a lot of problems with my wife and I! The symptom appeared immediately after stopping. I still have times of irritability that seem inappropriate. My sleep issues took a week or two to occur but they became my toughest symptoms. My sleep sounded just like yours - not insomnia so much, just a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep and anxiety was woven into all of that. That's almost entirely gone now. I cant believe it is basically gone but it is and there were many times I thought sleep would never be normal again, regardless of what I read on this forum!

    You're correct in saying, "We have to keep pulling forward". It's just going to be a matter of time. It looks like enough time went by for me to hopefully have mostly emerged from the craziness of cannabis withdrawal. Probably at the peak of my withdrawal a close friend lost her husband and was/still is struggling. When I asked her how she manages she said, "Life can bring tunnels but not caves, keep moving forward and you'll emerge from the tunnels."
    Last edited by Hyzer29; 07-01-2018 at 11:21 AM.

  8. #8
    Unregistered Cannabis Rehab Guest

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    Yea it really sucks but its slowly but surly coming back. I'm about to hit 4 months in a couple of days! I'm really looking forward to being completely there. I asked myself those questions too at the beginning but that's because you know the famous weed doesn't do that to you. So I was like am I going crazy?! For me it was anxiety and not feeling like myself. Everything else was intense but that took the whole cake! I was pretty much in like the fetal position shaking and crying for about almost two weeks. My husband got injured at work so he was able to be with me the first 3 weeks. I don't know how I did it but I got up in the morning and still got my kids ready for school and kept doing what I had to do. I was there too. I didn't believe I was showing improvements no matter what I read or what people told me. Including my husband. Time sucks when you're having fun because it goes too fast and it sucks when we are going through a hard time bc it goes too slow. I'm very sorry about your friend and her husband. I hope she is doing better. What she said is true even if sometimes those tunnels are as dark as caves but non the less they are still tunnels. Sending good vibes your way for you and your friend.

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