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Thread: 1 month clean - can't update my original post

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2019

    Default 1 month clean - can't update my original post

    So I'm 31 days in and wow what a 30 days. The first seven just sucked but I felt a new hope. The next 14 were great, minus the sleep issues. I felt clear headed and vibrant. Starting rediscovering things I love like playing music, reading, writing, being proactive with friends. That part is still there and it is great. But the last 7 days my reactivity has gotten out of control. I am like a f'n madman when it comes to just about anything. I think it's that I'm feeling these big emotions and I have no numbing agent to suppress them. I have no ability to not act out at the moment. Last night I finally broke down and took a Klonopin just to stop my spiraling. I mean, I'm feeling everything and I have no idea how to deal with it. I was never that good at feeling my feelings but the last 4 years I have completely buried them and just been on autopilot. Dating is a specific trigger and I think I am going to have to stop for a while, but of course last week I met an amazing woman. Of course, she likes to smoke weed. Of course. For 4 years I was looking for someone to smoke with me and I rarely found it, get sober and it's what I meet. I don't think she is an abuser and she thought it was great that I am clean but, crap! Oh well, I'm doing yoga, meditation, counseling. I take fish oil and eat a healthy diet. I've lost about 8 lbs and am looking and feeling pretty great. I know this is the right path, but these emotions and my reactivity is just crazy.

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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2019


    Congrats on one month! Please be careful with the klonopin. Have a plan next time youre feeling overwhelmed so you dont reach for another benzo. In my experience the emotions part of withdrawal was much worse in the second and third months.

    For assistance with finding a reputable and accredited Marijuana Rehab Service Provider in the USA you can call the US Government’s FREE SAMHSA’s National Helpline on:

    1-800-662-HELP (4357)

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